Stew's Exit

Stewart Wayne Young passed from this life to the next on May 31, 2008, at home, with his parents and his former wife by his side. Born January 10, 1971, in San Bernardino, he and his family moved to Yuba City when he was 11. He attended Faith Christian School and graduated from Yuba City High School in 1989. He was also a graduate of the University of Phoenix with a B.S. in Business Administration. In 1999 he and his wife moved to Seattle, Washington, where Stewart continued writing for various publications before becoming an insurance underwriter for States West Life in Seattle.
Throughout Stew’s illnesses he remained a gentle and joyful soul, and we will always remember his sense of humor, his thoughtfulness, and his strength in the face of adversity. He will be sorely missed, and will remain in our hearts forever.
Stewart is survived by his parents, Roberta and Kenneth Young, Yuba City; his sister, Margaret (Margee) Foley, Joplin, Missouri; grandmother, Clara Young, Victorville, CA; uncle, Richard Young, Victorville, CA, and his ex-wife, Monique (Young) Colver, Vancouver, WA. He was preceded in death by his maternal grandparents, Robert and Yolanda Hutchison, and his paternal grandfather, Chester Young.
A Celebration of Life will be held at New Beginnings Wesleyan Church, 616 C Street, Marysville, CA 95901, on June 7, 2008, at 11:00 am.
In lieu of flowers, please make donations to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), Colonial Place Three, 2107 Wilson Blvd #300, Arlington, VA 22201-3042, or Fremont-Rideout Cancer Center, 618 Fifth Street, Marysville, CA 95901, or Fremont-Rideout Hospice, 939 Live Oak Blvd, Yuba City, CA 95991.
Arrangements are under the direction of Lakeside Colonial Chapel in Marysville.

April 27, 2008

Stew is sounding like he feels a bit better now, says he does feel a bit better, though he was having considerable pain today. But his vacuum has been removed, so his wound is healing well.

April 22, 2008

Well, this is frustrating. Stew is still throwing up everything he eats. He had to get rehydrated today. Tomorrow he goes back in for chemo. His doctor is clueless. Surgery was supposed to fix this problem.

He's not feeling very good. I'm planning a trip down there end of next month.

April 8, 2008

Stew went home last night after all. So that's all the news for now.

April 7, 2008: 5 pm

The plan WAS for Stew to go home today. Alas, the plan failed. Isn't that so annoying, when a good plan fails? It wasn't because he's not ready to go home, it's because someone screwed up the vacuum order and the vacuum didn't go to the right place, and he must have the vacuum to go home with. Or to. Or something. Anyway. It's the vacuum. Tomorrow the vacuum should be at the right place and he can go home.

Not that he's not READY.

April 7, 2008

Stew says he might get to go home today. He's a bit nervous about it, what with the incision popping open incident last week and all.

He also said he had this weird feeling. I asked about it. He said, "It feels like no one's listening to me."

So I said, "No one's listening to you?"

And he responded: "No, they just keep repeating what I say."

And I said, "They just keep repeating what you say? Like I do?"

And he said, "Yes, like that."

I said, "Oh."

Lot of help I am. Yes, I am here to reinforce the impression that no one's listening to you, and we're all just repeating what you say!

Further updates to follow.

April 6, 2008

Proceeding well. Hospital food inedible, and he won't eat it for fear of being overcame with the throwing up thing. No infection in the wound and it's healing, still have a bit of an opening and they're concerned about the long drive home -- 44 miles could be difficult on a wound that's not quite closed apparently. He's surving on Gatorade, protein bars, and Jamba Juice being smuggled in from the outside . . . okay, perhaps it's not being smuggled in, the doctors say whatever he'll eat is fine, and since the hospital food is not agreeing with him . . . He keeps the food down an he'll be able to go home in a few days.

April 5: 10:30 am

When I called Stew this morning he sounded good. At the time, he was his feet were being attended to by his sister, Margee, who flew in to be with him while he's in the hospital. A foot rub is just what he needed today. He's not allowed to move much because of the incision healing thing, but he doesn't seem particularly uncomfortable. Pain when he moves too much at this point, but otherwise proceeding a-ok!

April 4, 2008: 1:27 pm

Just talked to Stew -- he's consuming a jamba juice, which is making him happy. Naturally permission was obtained from the doctor before said jamba juice was admitted to the hospital.

He sounds good. They're keeping him for a few more days and they're going to let the wound heal from the inside, or something like that.

Great. Now I want a jamba juice too.

Setback on Aisle Four

Fortunately Stew stayed in the hospital yesterday and didn't go home. I say fortunately, because last night when he got up to go to the restroom something happened, and his incision came open. Opened. Just like that. Naturally it was not the best feeling, suddenly seeing blood where none should be. And his nurse freaked out a bit too. Panic ensued.

He is now bound to his bed with more painkillers, with possible action today to deal with the problem. Surgery perhaps, to seal it back up? He sounds perhaps a bit, well, weary of the whole thing, and tired, because last night was not a good night to sleep, what with the incision popping open and causing panic. But today they will fix that.

I encouraged him to get some sleep for now, now that he's somewhat comfortably bound to his bed and unable to move, and the pain pills are kicking in. I have much faith in the restorative powers of sleep. And let's hope that this time they seal him up permanently.

April 3, 2008: 5 pm

Alas, Stew was unable to keep his lunch down as well as his breakfast, so they're taking x-rays and keeping him overnight.

He hasn't had solid food for two weeks, so that may be why his stomach doesn't know what to do with it now. I know my stomach would be terribly confused after two weeks of no food -- it would say, "what the hell?" So they're taking x-rays just to make sure there's nothing else wrong. They don't want to release him until he can keep real food down.

The first step, I think, would be to give him real food and not hospital food. Well, apparently they think the hospital food is real food, and it may well be, but I'm not exactly getting rave reviews from our patient.

Tomorrow would be a good day for him to go home though, don't you think?

April 3, 2008

Stew had some pain issues yesterday. Shouldn't be a big surprise, considering what he's gone through. Last night he sounded better though.

There's been talk of letting him out today. They currently have him under observation however because he threw up his breakfast. Eggs and hashbrowns. Real food. Of course, it's HOSPITAL food, and apparently it wasn't the best eggs and hashbrowns. He sounds good, says he's feeling okay. Perhaps they will see that he'll do much better at home with real food.

His sister showed up last night too! I'm sure he's happy to see her, and she him. Now let's hope he gets to go home today!

April 2, 2008: Later that morning

Stew tells me they might let him go home tomorrow. He says the first thing he's going to do is have tacos.

I said maybe the first thing he does is to NOT have tacos. Sheesh. Boys.

April 2: 8:50 am

Today's report brings us details from Stew's mom. They are apparently trying to poison Stew with hospital food, which will naturally defeat the purpose of him being there, but I am certain he will overcome the evil forces of the unidentifiable food.

The good news is, he's eating. He had chocolate pudding yesterday. He wouldn't eat the soup, but that wasn't his fault. It was inedible. He did drink some coffee and milk too. And some apple juice in place of the inedible soup. This is all very good for someone who just had 18 inches of colon removed. The IV in his neck has been removed and the catheter, and he's been taking short exhausting walks.

The doctor is contemplating starting him on one dose of chemo before sending him home (possibly end of the week, he's recovering so well), then start back on once a week chemo for the liver.

April 1, 2008, 4:00 pm

All's well. Boredom has set in. Hospitals are not very interesting places, as a rule, if one is a patient and not watching the bedlam on television. Which bring me to my next question: Since there is such a dearth of activities available, why can't they at least spring for premium cable? Five channels is supposed to entertain the multitudes of ill people who are just looking to fill some time while they serve some time, but it just isn't enough.

And so we start a new crusade. Premium cable in hospitals! What? Too expensive? Carve some funds out of something redundant, like cat scans, because how many cats need to be scanned anyway? Or free coffee for doctors! Let them buy their own coffee. How about fewer x-rays? Look, if my arm is broken and the splintered shards are poking out of my skin, the doctor had better know what it all means without having to resort to pictures. How about less plants to spruce the place up! I like plants as well as the next person, but let's get real: they're not very entertaining, unless they're the kind that eat things, and those can be tricky to have around. Indeed, I can think of many things that we can eliminate.

A new crusade.

April 1, 2008, 10:00 am

Stew said he appreciates greatly the well wishes he's received. He sounds a bit perky today. I know what you're thinking. Stew? Our Stew? Perky? Yes, it's true. He's been cleaned up for the public and actually, I do believe, slept during the night. This is quite amazing progress and requires superhuman fortitude, since, as we all know, sleeping in a hospital is not an easy task.

I'd just gotten on the phone with him when his parents arrived, so I signed off. For now. More later.

March 31, 10:00 pm

Today Stew was visited by his friends Tim and Jake. Tim was telling Stew about the awesome pizza he and Jake had tried over the weekend, and how delicious it was, and how they highly recommended it, when Stew stopped him. "Y'know, I haven't had any food at all for over a week," Stew said, "and you're talking about pizza!" Tim apologized and then said, "Here, have some ice chips."

Yay. Ice chips. Boys. Fortunately Stew's still not in any sort of condition to make Tim regret tormenting him like that, but in the end it doesn't really matter, does it? It doesn't matter because every day Stew is getting closer to eating food. Today it was water. Tomorrow, broth and tea. After that, who knews? Before too long, a pizza. He had an evening walk to the nurse's station. They're considering what equipment he'll need when he goes back home -- the hospital bed that had been in his room for months was returned when it was never used, but now it'll have to come back, at least for a bit. A minor inconvenience. At this point, I know he just really wants to go home. And before long, he will.

March 31, 2008: 3:45 pm

The nose tube is out! The diet is clear liquid! He's starting to walk! And he sounds so much better. Well, of course he does, he's no longer talking with tubes up his nose. And get this: he feels better!

Things are progressing well, I think. He's watching L&O (an activity of which I heartily approve), glad to be able to start taking in sustenance, and sounding like his old self again.

March 31, 2008

Just checked in with our favorite patient -- this is not normally a topic I would share with others, but considering he just had part of his intestines removed, I think the fact that he's having trouble getting any sleep because he's been up with bowel movement problems since 2 am merits a mention. Things are starting to work.

March 30th, 9:44 pm

What does one do in the hospital? Other than sit quietly and wait for release? I don't know, and I bet Stew doesn't know either. When I talked to him tonight he sounded bored. And tired. Bored and tired. Of course, he can't have any electronic equipment in the hospital because it could be stolen. Aren't hospitals great?

He had a pretty horrible morning, what with leaking IV and the accidentally pulled out tubes. Ouch, I still say. I've offered to go down there and beat up the hospital staff if necessary, and he says he wishes I would. I should have asked, first of all, if they're bigger than me. I may need reinforcements. Fighting isn't really my thing, after all. I'm not exactly what one would call . . . skilled. Or ept. My only real chance is in falling on them, a valuable skill I learned in Aikido before I dropped out.

Anyway, so he's not feeling so good, but he's feeling better than he was. I tell him it'll be over before he knows it and he'll be able to go home. I tell him these things, but I know 10 days in a hospital can seem like a year. I've spent a day or two in the hospital before and it always seemed an eternity. He's still only sitting in a chair for periods of time, not even doing the walking thing yet. How fun. Not.

I told we were going to San Diego in July for a wedding. He said, "a wedding and a funeral." I said, "we aren't going to any funerals this year, or next year, or the year after." He said okay. I know at times he's been so miserable he wished it would just end, but it's just not time yet.

Not that I would know, I'm just saying.

March 30th, 10 am

Called Stew about 10 this morning. His dad answered the phone, then put Stew on. He hasn't been having a very good day. His IV was leaking, apparently all over him. Then when a nurse came to fix it, she slipped and fell, and in the process the tube going into his nose was pulled, or jerked, out. Ouch. It sounds more like hospital slapstick than taking care of sick people. He's still recovering from the latest assault to his person, and his dignity, and asked me to call back in a couple of hours.

March 29, 2008

Talked to Stew on the phone. He said he'd tried to call me but got a busy signal. That's odd -- he should have gotten my voicemail. Then again, those hospital phones . . . I've given him my personal 800 number, and told him he can call it anytime.

He sounds tired. Well, duh, he just had major surgery, lost part of his intestines and part of his colon and his appendix and . . . he doesn't remember what else they told him. Has other things on his mind. Said the doctors found what they expected to find -- pile o'cancer. But there was something in his voice that was different from two days ago, back when he'd been dreading the surgery because, well, hell, surgery is to be dreaded, is it not? He'd never had surgery before, and before he went in I'd told him it was not nearly as scary as it sounded -- they'd give him something, he'd fall asleep before he even realized it, and when he woke up, it'd all be over.

I didn't tell him that was the easy part. One thing at a time. Now comes the recovery, a part of I've never particularly cared for myself.

Something was different today. Relief, I think partly. Relief that the surgery part was over, and that they'd taken out most, if not all, of the intestinal cancer. Of course, there's still the liver, and there's nothing to be done about that, but one thing at a time. This is what's been making him so miserable, made him unable to eat, made him vomit seemingly continuously.

Time for the next step. The recovery part.

A Successful Surgery

He made it through surgery, sans some intestines, but who really needs all their intestines anyway? Being impatient and not thinking clearly, my normal state, I called him the next day. He answered the phone, and said he'd been better. His parents were there, so I said I'd talk to him later.

So there he is, with tubes going in and out, in pain, barely able to speak, and there's his ex-wife, calling him to ask, "So, how you doing?"

I am so thoughtful.

I talked to his mother lately. They'd had him sitting up already, for an hour or so. He was weak when he went into surgery, he's been so sick for so long, yet there he was, sitting in a chair.

So there's that. Surgery completed. Maybe back to chemo later on. But first things first -- recovery from the surgery.

March 27, 2008

He's in surgery now. Went in about 5:17 pm.